Somebody needs to explain to me.............

I wish I knew the logic behind "being on chemo and being sick" and "being off of chemo and being sick".

I've heard the "off period" being described as "withdrawl". To me, withdrawl is something that comes when you want something like heroin, alcohol or whatever drug you're hooked on, and you can't get it. In my case, the last thing in the world I want is another hit of Temzolomide.

Day one of chemo sometimes brings about commode hugging. Five straight days of chemo does not mean five straight days of doing "the barforama maneuver".

Sometimes it may mean 3 days but generally speaking, it doesn't mean five days in a row of barfola.

After the five days, you have 25 days off. I'm somewhere around the 20th day off today and was so sick this morning, I had difficulty even walking to the bathroom. Damned if I can figure it out!

In any event, sometimes it's really tough to make it through a single day. I've exhausted my insurance benefits and I now have roughly $40,000 worth of liablities. That may not seem like much but after already spending $40,000, it's a pretty steep hill to climb.

I need to go back to work, sell a killer sized stone job and make enough commission to overcome this mess. You have to remember, I've been in the bed or on the couch since June 21st of 09. That's along time for a hyper active road warrior like me. I just want to get rollin again and stop all this stomach business.

I like my job alot cause it has everything in it that a speed freak needs. Trains, rail cars, dump trucks, helicopters, tanks, one Army Base, several asphalt plants, a rock quarry, a sand and gravel plant and huge front end loaders. They're so much fun even Tonka makes em'.

I'm not bitchin or complainin'. I'm just tellin' it like it is and hope that this note might inspire some of you to "up" your insurance coverages to a much higher level than they are now.

Just the brain surgery, intensive care, hospital room, chemo and radiation fee was over $300,000.00. My veteran coverages took care of all that except for the hospital bill in Leesville when I was unconcious and in the process of being transferred to the VA.

I spent 3 to 4 hours there and it cost $17,000.00. The ambulance ride was $4,800.00. Check your insurance coverage, check it today! You'll be glad you did.

Still hangin' tough as I know how to hang. Still fightin' as hard as I know how to fight.

Thanks to Charlie, Curt, Bernie, Mo, Bill, Doug and my buddies from the 11th Cav and the 199th Light Infantry Brigade. Also, thanks to big brother, his buddies in the prayer group, Phil, John and Sue, Joey, Marfa Soo and all the gang from school days.

Special thanks to all you girls out there that have been so thoughtful, especially in the food, soup, cake, muffin and pie department. During those times when I can eat, I really enjoyed that.

Sr.