Conflicting Emotions

Have you ever experienced something in your life that prevented you from moving forward or forced you to become stationary in your thought processes about solving a specific problem? I wish I could ask that question in a more easily understood format but I'm experiencing a whole lot of conflicting situations right now and I can't seem to move forward.

It's almost like I'm stuck on something and that I believe in the history of things so strongly, that I simply can not accept any answers that conflict with all the evidence we've been given by the history we've already created and experienced. With all the information we have, how stupid do you have to be to believe that everything is just hunky dory?

I'll be the first one to admit that I've had hell since the brain surgery anda whole lot of hell with all of the things that came after that.  I've had a pretty emotional time dealing with the human garbage that attacked my sweet and wonderul Aunt Margie who I dearly love.

Despite the emotional conflicts with all that, I managed to visit with her today during lunch.  Her sister was there and so was her younger son and his wife. She's really doing well and I'm really looking forward to having lots of lunches with her in the new place her boys found for her. It's big as a palace and she'll be treated like a queen there and I know it.

The only part of that situation that I consider to be a conflict, has to do with the perp. I want some justice done and  until it is and I find out about it, I'm going to stay in conflict with that situation. I want his head on a platter and until some kind of sentence is given to him, I won't consider this to be finished.

Crime comes with punishment and I know that I'll remain cornered until I get the word t hat his life is going to be spent behind bars and he learns that the 11th Commandment is: "Thou Shalt Not Mess with the McInnis Family.

It isn't the political situation nor is it the multitude of memories from Vietnam and Cambodia that contains so many conflicts.

Most recently, all of these things have been on my mind but now, with all the information that comes with another anniversary of 911, I simply can't seem to move forward.

I have a sense that something is bad wrong and for some reason, as far as I can tell, nobody with the news media is doing a very good job covering the specifics of things that exist today or the history of things where we've experienced global sized problems before.

As I watched the documentary presented as "9/11: The Days After", I began to see what part of the problem is. I think it has to do with the history we've experienced during all the conflicts we've had during our history as a Country. It's rock solid history and because of that, the evidence supports my concern "that something is bad wrong."

It's impossible for me to sum it up in a sentence or even a short paragraph but I'll try to do that in an explanation that won't require me to write a book to get the point across. I'll do that by saying the following:

Pearl Harbor was the attack that caused us to declare war but it wasn't the only attack, it was only the first attack. There was a very long list of attacks after that but our response turned those attacks around and made them defensive instead of offensive. It took years and years with battle after battle before that was conflict was over.

The same thing is true in Europe. There was a long period of time between the sinking of the Lusitania and the day Hitler killed himself. It took two world wars to wipe them out. One torpedo eventually led to the slaughter of millions and took almost 35 years to clean up the mess and throw out the human garbage that started it all..

Whether we want to admit it or not, we're still having to deal with an idiot in North Korea. That's been roughly 61 years ago. The French had their Dien Bien Phu in the early 50's. We had Khe Sahn, the Cambodians had Pol Pot who was just as bad as Hitler. The North Vietnamese have relocated and re-educated alot of the population there and in one case I know of personally, one girl was relocated to the north where she is basically an indentured servant on a rubber plantation.

Think it's finished? It's not and it's far from being over. We can dig back in history to conflicts that raged 3,400 years ago and they're still in conflict today. It ain't over.

There's the answer to the Conflicting Emotions I've been having. I guess it's fair to say that I know it ain't over but I also know what has to happen before it's going to end.

For now, I'll just leave you with that explanation of conflicting emotions. I may continue with this but it depends on the personal emails or comments I get regarding these statements.